19 April 2010

Negro Is, Negro Ain't: On Erica Jong's Version of Oprah

Last week, Erica Jong wrote the most random "book review" (or something) I have ever read in my life.  In her Huffington Post blog, Jong, apparently charged with discussing Kitty Kelley's recently published unauthorized biography of Oprah Winfrey, essentially writes about knowing both Winfrey and Kelley, and admits that she hasn't actually finished the text in question.  (Note to self: Figure out how to get a gig like Erica Jong.)  In this latest version of "I knew [insert famous person] when...," Jong had the following observation about the divine Ms. O:


Oprah seems to have gotten more mistrustful with fame, not less. [Biggie said it best, "Mo' money, mo' problems.] And she seems to have gotten more race conscious than she was when she was younger. You never felt that Oprah was a professional Negro. [How does one feel that another has become a professional Negro?]  She seemed totally unaware of race [Look behind the veil, Erica] -- but what do I know about being black? [Absolutely nothing.]  It's not like being Jewish with a Chinese nom de plume.  [Obviously.]
I believe that racism is far from extinguished [Fire! Fire!] in the world -- despite the celebration that greeted the election of Barack Obama to the presidency.  [Logical fallacy. Perhaps they were celebrating because an idiot was no longer the face of this country.  Just a guess.]  Racism lurks in our country and all over the world. [Stalkers lurk.  Racism doesn't.] But people who have transcended prejudice have a special obligation not to carry grudges. After all, grudges hurt the grudge-holder most. [Really? James Byrd begs to differ.]  We also have a responsibility to set a good example by not holding grudgers. [We also have a responsibility not to write about things we don't know about as if we know about them. #Fail]
(Note to self: If you can amass a large readership, you can publish all kinds of silly crap for the next 30 years.)

(Another note to self: Reconsider your position on the word Negro.  Your support of it seems to make other folks feel like they have permission to use it.)

My apologies for all those bracketed interjections.   I just couldn't help myself.

After reading Jong's blog, I could only wonder: Are there two Oprah Winfreys?  Because the one Jong describes, this professional Negro, I don't know her.

See, if I am not careful, I may become a professional Negro.  I have thought about what it means to be a problem.  I know what the T stands for in Booker T. Washington--without the help of Wiki. I am a Negro among Negroes.  So much so that whenever I read about Chicago Bulls coach, Vinny del Negro, I mispronounce his name.  I know each verse to "Lift Ev'ry Voice and Sing" (and that there's an apostrophe in the title).  I can detect an octoroon from 50 paces away.   I know professional Negroes.  And Oprah ain't one.

Professional Negroes do things like show up for rallies in honor  of black people who have been slighted.  White people think professional Negroes are the leaders of the downtrodden black nation; professional Negroes also believe this lie.  Tavis Smiley follows professional Negroes on Twitter.  CNN, MSNBC, Fox News, NPR, etc. have professional Negroes on speed dial to explain to their clueless audience the significance of Michelle Obama double-dutching on the White House lawn.   Professional Negroes go to graduate school and write dissertations on other professional Negroes.   Professional Negroes are the only Negroes on your favorite blog's or newspaper's staff; they write editorials on Negroes.

I don't even think Oprah hangs out with professional Negroes.  She definitely doesn't have them on her show.  Oprah likes Chris Rock & Tyler Perry (both professional black women haters), the Huxtables Obamas (professional black role models), Mary J. Blige (professional 'hood chick who came up), Maya Angelou (professional wise black person or something), and Gayle (professional best friend).  None of those folks are professional Negroes.  Jong should not confuse Winfrey's use of one of America's favorite archetypes, the mammy, to hustle her way into a billion or so dollars as professional Negro-dom.   Totally different career path and job requirements.  Negroes seemingly have more Negro pride than that.  Besides, being a professional Negro has never been that lucrative.  Ever.

(Note to self: consider a career change.)

(Another not to self: Stop publicly dissing Oprah. You live in the world, and she's one of its rulers.)

3 comments:

elle said...

This came up in my class tonight! They read Deborah Gray White's Ar'n't I a Woman? and digressed into talking about how "mammy" has been repackaged. But they were absolutely floored when I brought up Oprah. One of my students told me I had to write an article on it. Didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't the first to make the observation.

Anonymous said...

driving this Runescape Moneyspecific through to Michael. Additionally I'll be perusing this differently in comparison with professorjawn...on the other hand find an individual disagreeing thatcheap Diablo 3 gold will black social creation seemed to be ever ideologically thin.

rscredits said...

buy runescape gold with 5% discount code:CHRISTMAS.

Details: http://www.rsorder.com/profile/news/read/id/443

Free 200M runescape gold Giveaway on RSorder Flash Sale! Time: 03:00 AM on December 21, 2012 GMT

To know more: http://www.rsorder.com/profile/news/read/id/441

Like RSorder Facebook to Get 200M Free rs gold! If our facebook fans reach to 10,000, we will send out totally 200M free RS gold.

Rsorder facebook : http://www.facebook.com/RSorderSite?ref=tn_tnmn

Detailed info at: http://www.rsorder.com/profile/news/read/id/435

Fast delivery can be assured if you buy rs gold pay by Western Union at Rsorder!

Designer Labels

$40 million slaves (3) 2010 (1) 4-letter words (1) 80s (1) 8th grade (1) 90s (4) a different world (1) africa (1) aladdin (1) american values (4) amy winehouse (1) anderson cooper (1) anniversary (3) antoine dodson (1) apple (1) arizona (1) athletes (1) awkward black girl (1) barack obama (13) barbara walters (1) basketball (6) beer (1) bet (1) BET Awards (2) beyonce (4) bill clinton (1) bill duke (1) bill withers (1) birthdays (1) black beauty (1) black girls (4) black kids (4) black like me (1) black love is dead (2) black masculinity (1) black people (13) black respectability (1) black thought (1) black women (7) blacks (1) blame it on the alcohol (1) blaphemy (1) blind side (1) blizzard (1) blogging (1) bob marley (1) Bobby Brown (1) books (4) brandy (1) bryan safi (1) bryant gumbel (1) burger kind (1) cam'ron (1) capitalism (2) census 2010 (1) cereal (1) chappelle's show (1) charles barkley (1) chaz bono (1) chicago (3) chick-fil-a (2) chris broussard (1) chris brown (1) christmas (3) cinema (2) class (1) college (1) college basketball (1) coming out (1) commencement (2) commercials (2) common (3) current tv (1) d'angelo (2) dad (1) daddy (1) dark girls (1) dave chappelle (1) david stern (1) dead prez (1) death penalty (2) dee rees (1) democracy (1) dibs (1) diddy (1) dilla (1) dirty laundry (1) disaster (1) disney (1) dissertation (4) diva (1) don't ask don't tell (1) donell jones (1) drew brees (1) dwele (2) ebony (1) eddie long (1) education (1) election (1) enwhitlement (1) erica jong (1) erykah badu (3) esperanza spaulding (1) espn (2) et. al. (1) etc. (1) facebook (1) faggot (1) family (1) family stand (1) fantasy football (1) federal holidays (1) feminism (1) film (2) football (7) for colored girls (1) forgiveness (2) fox news (1) free agency 2010 (1) freedom (2) gabby sidibe (3) game (1) gang starr (1) gay hip hop (1) gender (1) geraldo rivera (1) ghetto heaven (1) gifts (1) god (1) going green (2) golf (1) grace jones (1) graduate school (1) graduation (2) grandma (1) grant hill (2) grocery shopping (1) guns (1) guru (1) haiti (4) hall of fame (1) halloween (1) harlem (1) harper lee (1) harry reid (1) hateration (1) henry louis gates (1) high school (1) hip hop (3) holding history (1) hood pass (1) hoodies (1) huck finn (2) hurricane katrina (1) immigration (3) instant vintage (2) internet (1) introductions (1) ipad (1) ipod (1) isiah thomas (1) jail (2) jalen rose (2) janelle monae (1) janet jackson (1) jazmine sullivan (1) jennifer hudson (1) john howard griffin (1) john mayer (1) jokes (2) just jokes (1) kanye west (2) kelly dodson (1) kfc (1) kia (1) kim wayans (1) kinky reggae (1) kitty kelley (1) kobe (1) kobe bryant (1) kreayshawn (1) krs-one (1) kwanzaa (1) lamya (1) language (1) late night with jimmy fallon (1) latin america (1) laurence fishburne (1) lauryn hill (6) lebron james (6) lena horne (1) lenny kravitz (1) lesbians of color (1) levar burton (1) lgbt (1) life after death (2) lists (1) little dragon (1) live blogging (1) logan square (1) long live the message (1) lupe fiasco (1) macon d. (1) magic johnson (1) maia campbell (1) making the band (1) man men (1) march madness (1) mariah carey (1) mark twain (1) marriage (1) martin lawrence (1) martin luther the king (3) mary j. blige (1) masculinity (1) mayor (1) me (1) mexicans (1) michael jackson (9) michael jordan (1) michael vick (1) michelle obama (1) Mike Tyson (1) military (1) MLK Day (1) mo'nique (1) mom (1) monday (1) money (3) montana fishburne (1) morality (1) movies (7) muhsinah (1) multiracial (1) muppets (1) music (19) my block (1) my former life (4) my personal issues (14) mystic brew (1) n (1) nannie (5) national coming out day (1) nba (2) negroes (7) new orleans (1) nfl (1) nigger (1) nihilism (2) nike (1) nina simone (1) nobel peace prize (1) not voting (1) occupy wall street (2) octavia spencer (1) oprah winfrey (4) osama bin laden (2) oscar (2) oscar grant (1) painting (1) pariah (1) pat robertson (2) paul beatty (1) paul laurence dunbar (1) paula patton (1) peyton manning (1) phaedra parks (2) phd (1) pictures (1) playboy (1) plays (1) poetry (2) police (2) politics (10) polkadotted stripes (5) pop life (56) porn (1) post cereal (1) post-race (18) post-soul (1) postmodernism (1) precious (5) prop 8 (1) push (1) qpoc (1) queen latifah (4) queer as folk (6) quoteable (1) racialicious (1) racism (14) randomness (1) reading is fundamental (2) repeal (1) resolutions (1) retirement (1) rhoa (1) richard daley (1) Rick James (1) rick perry (1) rihanna (1) robots (1) robyn crawford (1) rolling in the whip (1) rumors (6) run on (1) running (1) sade (1) sammy sosa (1) samples (1) sandra bullock (3) sapphire (1) school (1) sesame street (1) sexuality (9) Shingai Shoniwa (1) shows (1) slang (1) slavery (2) slum village (1) slurs (1) snoop dogg (1) sotomayor (1) soulja boy (1) sports (8) starbucks (1) stuff white people do (1) super bowl (2) survival (1) Teena Marie (1) tell him (1) terence trent d'arby (1) the 70s (1) the 80s (2) the banal. (1) the blind side (1) the civil rights movement (1) the clipse (1) the color purple (1) the cosby show (1) the dougie (1) the everyday (1) the fab five (3) the foreign exchange (1) the golden girls (1) the gregory brothers (1) the help (2) the hunger games (2) the lion king (1) the lovers and friends show (1) the new year (1) the NOISEttes (1) the nutcracker (1) the princess and the frog (1) the puppets (1) the roots (1) the smurfs (1) the view (1) the white boy shuffle (1) this is it (1) tiger woods (4) to kill a mockingbird (1) toure (1) toussaint l'ouverture (1) trader joe's (2) trayvon martin (2) trouble the water (1) troy davis (1) tv (1) twelve (1) twitter (1) tyler perry (5) usc (1) valentine's day (1) viola davis (1) voodoo (1) voting (1) Wayne Brady (1) web series (1) white house correspondents dinner (1) white house press corps (1) white men (1) white people (1) white saviors (1) white women (1) white women rappers (1) whitney houston (4) whoopi goldberg (1) will.i.am (1) william rhoden (1) william wordsworth (1) willow smith (2) wishing well (1) women (1) world cup (1) writing (1) wyclef (1) zo (1)